When things go south....

One of those moments when you know you're really f***ed.

Ugly....

You're so ugly you have to put a bag over your head just to get your dog to hump your leg.

Hookers....

Every time a shot glass breaks a hooker dances on a table.... Or is that with bells and angel wings... can't remember too drunk!

Pets....

I love pets, my ex had three dogs that I loved a lot. They were some of the most well trained animals I've ever been around. Gypsy, Zorro and good o'l Scooby. Those were some great dogs. Haha!